Tomorrow is the much anticipated Bar Golf Crawl...18 holes (bars) of pure debauchery. This is how it will go down.
Originally we were going to start the crawl off at Bing's Patriot Pad and then make our way back toward's Garnett, stopping off at Club Grand for a couple holes and finally Longboards for hole 10. This idea has been scratched for a more simplistic approach. Holes 1-9 will be at Club Grand which leaves us with a short one block walk to LB's for hole 10.
Men: Bring a handle and non light beer for holes 1-9. The golf tourney will kick off at 3 PM!!!!! We will set the time limit at 20 minutes per hole at the house, with beer pong, random games and shit talking commencing as well. At the end of the 9 holes we will make our way to the back nine which will be played out on the difficult Garnett bar course. I'm thinking that we will be hitting the bars between 6 and 7 PM.
THE SCORECARD
PARS (-1)
Non Light Beer
Shots (i.e. svedka, tequila, whiskey)
Bloody Marys
Mojitos
Highballs (i.e. rum & coke, vodka tonic)
BIRDIES (-2)
Jager Bomb
Car Bomb
Mind Eraser
Rumpies
Long Island
Grateful Dead
Sake Bomb
Goldschlager
EAGLES (-3)
Three Wise Men
Four Horse Men
Cement Mixer
Liquid Cocaine (151, Jager, Gold)
Praire Fire (Tabasco and Tequila)
Koshermeisters (Jager and Pickle Juice)
HOLE IN ONE (-4)
Shot of 151
Bar Mat Shot
THE RULES
At every hole a drink on par level must be consumed to remain EVEN. Every drink after that will then be minused from your score. For example, if you have one non light beer at the bar and then drink one more non light beer you have a score of -1, not -2. The first beer merely keeps you at even and the next drink scores you. There is no limit to the amount of drinks you can have on each hole so in theory you can have one non light beer and three Cement Mixers and be -9 after one hole. This strategy may kill you though so planning with the help of your caddie is recommended.
THE BOGIES (penalty strokes)
Each penalty commited will result in a stroke being added to your score
THROW UP +5
EATING FOOD +4
KICKED OUT OF THE BAR +2
WATER FOUL (drinking H2O) +1
P***Y FOUL (ordering a coke back for a shot or training wheels for tequila) +1
NON ALCHOLIC DRINK +1
SPILL FOUL (spill your drink or someone elses) +1
LIGHT BEER FOUL +1
**also if you spill a fellow man challengers drink, he gets the points for that drink no matter how full it was.
**for every bar that you don't have a drink in that will be counted as a bogie (+1) so if you are denied entrance into a bar on the course WE WILL NOT BE CHANGING TO ANOTHER BAR AND YOU WILL BE GIVEN A +1. Missing consecutive bars results in the score doubling for every bar (i.e. first bar missed +1, second bar +2, third bar +3...you miss three bars in row you will have +6 added to your score and so on). So, don't black out, pass out or bitch out before hole 18 because it will be the end of your chances for man glory on the Bar Golf Course.
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