Another day closer to the kick off of SOM and I have to be honest, I'm getting pretty excited about it. Another day also brings new information that looks to shake up the first leg of the competition. Rudy (our late addition and the jury is still out on whether he was a good addition at all) is traveling abroad to Brazil tomorrow and will be missing the first two (and possibly three) competitions. This was not as surprising as news broke that Bing will also missing the first competition as well. Rudy understandbly has been playing on trouncing around Rio in a man thong for quite some time and given the fact that we added him last minute to even things out for certain challenges, I understand his absence for the first of numerous battles. But Bing? Really? Did we not sit around a table for three hours at Longboard's setting up a schedule to avoid situations such as this one? In light of these new revelations, a couple of questions arise.
Q #1....What should the penalty be for missing a head to head challenge?
Q #2....Should a challenger be suspended for missing more than three competitions in a row?
Q#3.....Should a challenger be able to make up a missed competition?
and
Q#4....Would it be OK for you to name your unborn children after me telling them, "I named you after one of the greatest men I've ever been bested by on the battlefield back in the summer of 2010."
My opinion is Yes, Yes, No and Obviously yes.
First, I believe missing a challenge earns you a big fat 0. Ant recommended maybe negative points, which I could get behind, but I think a 0 is technically a negative 1 anyway.
Second, when I hatched this idea I envisioned a head to head battle between only two people for the same reason Biggie rapped "Mo Money Mo Problems" The more assholes you have to get together the more problems arise. Six people was a little much in my mind, but I believe we planned ahead for everything in advance to combat this problem. So on that note, absence of three straight challenges should be considered ridiculously unacceptable. That's almost a month of shit. So I believe you miss three, bye bye.
Third, question...would Shaun White be the fucking beast of a competitor that he is today on the halfpipe if he called Vancouver this year from Vail and said, "Hey something came up here in CO, I'm not going to be able to make the Olympics this month, but good news, I just completed a sick ass run and a couple of my buddies judged it and they think I got a 9.4 out of 10... so could you just pencil me in for that and send the gold medal to my mailing address. Thanks bro." The simple answer is fuck no. He's great because he shows up on game day and kicks everyone's ass. This is our Olympics. We don't mail it in. And we sure as shit don't make dates up. This isn't Chem Lab 101 and we aren't pimply freshman (although Jantz is the closest to resembling one) We should be chiseled specimens of man meat by the end of this competition because we battled head to head each week and like the gladiators of old when one man is left standing, he's standing for one reason and one reason only....because he earned it.
and lastly, Zach is a wonderful name for a son (or daughter even) and wouldn't you rather it be Zach than Peter which we all know is a slang term for dick?
These are my opinions, but I am just one (superhuman) man. What are your thoughts?
TEE TIMES
The first competition is set. We are playing Mission Trails Golf Course at 10:30 AM. Cost is a manly 43 plus a 2 dollar res. fee. We can meet up at Club Grand the morning of if you'd like to carpool over (although Jantz that makes no sense for you given the fact that the course is over by State). Lets get it on.
z$
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